Sure, August only just left the building and September’s barely rustling its autumnal leaves—but here at Smithers HQ, the Christmas questions are already rolling in hot. So I figured it’s time to beat the festive rush, throw on my Santa hat, and deliver the Top Quirky Christmas Gifts from St. Nick himself. No sleigh required.
It seems the smart cookies are shopping earlier every year—some even bagged quirky Christmas gifts during our summer sales. Hats off to them. Every December, I swear I’ll join their ranks… then inevitably find myself elbow-deep in wrapping paper on Christmas Eve, dashing around like a lunatic (alongside every other last-minute bloke). Not this year, I say. Probably.
Anyway, less waffle, more gifting. Let’s get this sleigh moving.
🎁 Number 1: The White Stag’s Head – A Minimalist Showstopper
First up, a gift that’s cooler than a snowdrift and classier than a mulled wine spritz.
The White Stag’s Head isn’t your local boozer—it’s one of our latest bust wall hangings, and it’s got festive flair written all over it. Clean white finish. Gleaming gold antlers. Bags of understated charm. And just begging for a cheeky bauble or ribbon come December.
It’s stylish, gender-neutral, and has already climbed the Smithers bestseller list—especially popular with design-savvy ladies. Pop it in your partner’s stocking or gift it as a statement piece for that friend who loves a little luxe with their quirk. Festive, yes. But this stag doesn’t hibernate after New Year.
🎁 Number 2: Vinyl Neon Light Sign – For the DJ Who’s Been Very Good
Next on the list: A glowing tribute to the golden age of grooves.
This Vinyl Neon Light Sign brings full-on retro club energy, decked out in pink and blue and boxed in a slick mirrored acrylic case. It’s bold. It’s brash. And it’s built for the kind of music lover who files their records alphabetically and believes glow should come standard.
Whether it’s spinning in a DJ booth, lighting up a home studio, or giving your record wall the pop it deserves, this one’s a proper head-turner.
Shopping for a gift for a vinyl collector, or just want to treat yourself to something louder than socks? This is the piece that hits the right note—every time.
🎁 Number 3: Dead Fred Pen Holder – For That Colleague Who’s Hanging by a Thread
Every office has one—the mate who smiles through the madness while slowly losing the will to live between Teams calls. Enter Dead Fred, the gloriously twisted pen holder that lets you stab your stress away without getting fired.
He’s floppy, funny, and surprisingly therapeutic. Just jam your pen right into his chest and let the day’s frustrations melt into mildly concerning joy.
Perfect for workmates, Secret Santa chaos, or anyone with a warped sense of humour (so, all of us here at Smithers). Dead Fred doesn’t judge. He just lies there… and takes it.
🎁 Number 4: Seletti Wears Toiletpaper Mirror – For Those Who Like Their Reflection… Weird
Mirror, mirror on the wall—who’s the quirkiest of them all?
Answer: Seletti Wears Toiletpaper. This gloriously strange compact mirror features everything from lipstick-covered hands to playing cards and surrealist flower motifs, all wrapped in a sunshine-yellow frame that practically screams “gift me.”
It’s foldable, hangable, and entirely unpredictable—just like the person you’re buying it for. Perfect for bold bedrooms, dressing tables, or anyone who likes their daily reflection served with a side of pop-art madness.
At just £35, it’s a small price to pay for big weird energy.
🎁 Number 5: Soldier Helmet Clock – For the Ex-Military Legend or MAS*H Superfan
Time waits for no one—but it does look a hell of a lot cooler when it’s ticking out of a soldier’s helmet.
Our Soldier Helmet Wall Clock is a proper nod to vintage army gear, designed for fans of military memorabilia, war-room interiors, or anyone still secretly obsessed with MASH reruns*. Rugged, bold, and weirdly stylish, it’s the kind of gift that stands to attention on any wall—office, study, or bunker.
Buy it for the old-school hero in your life. Or for yourself—because nothing says “organised” like a helmet full of time. At £100, it’s a serious piece of design with just the right amount of quirky edge.
🎁 Number 6: Foxy Neon Light – For the Woman Who Knows She Is
Some gifts whisper. This one winks.
The Foxy Neon Light casts a bold yellow glow from a mirrored box that turns heads and raises eyebrows. Equal parts flirty and fierce, it’s the perfect piece for dressing rooms, bedside tables, or anywhere your favourite foxy lady likes to make a statement.
Better yet? It’s now £125 (was £160)—so if you’re gonna light her up this Christmas, now’s the time to do it.
🎁 Number 7: Captain Legless Corkscrew – For the Boozy Legend in Your Life (£11)
Every Christmas needs a hero. Ours just happens to be legless.
Meet Captain Legless—the corkscrew-slash-bottle-opener that brings laughs before the first sip’s even poured. Equal parts pirate, party-starter, and practical tool, he’s the ideal sidekick for wine lovers, beer drinkers, and chaotic kitchens alike.
At just £11, it’s the perfect Secret Santa win or stocking filler with a twist—literally.
Pop him in a gift bag, pour something decent, and let the festive drinking games begin.
🎁 Number 8: Thunder Robot – For the Grown Man Who Still Wants to Save the Galaxy (£115)
Warning: Not suitable for children. Only for fully grown nerds with taste.
Meet Thunder Robot, a reproduction Japanese battery-operated bot with full retro firepower. Handmade from iron tinplate, this bad boy walks, spins, fires lasers (sort of), and whirls his helmet propeller like it’s 1956 and the future just landed.
It runs on 2 chunky D batteries and pure nostalgia—making it the ultimate Christmas gift for collectors, sci-fi fans, or anyone who thinks adulthood should include more robots.
Because why grow up when you can gear up?
🎁 Number 9: Skull Shot Glass Set – For the One Who Drinks Like the Dead (£12)
Some say spooky season ends in October. We say pour another.
The Smithers Skull Shot Glass Set is the ultimate bar-side sidekick for those who like their drinks with bite. At just £12, it’s the perfect little thrill for Halloween fiends, gothic spirits, or anyone who prefers their tequila with a side of afterlife.
Serve shots. Raise eyebrows. And give a gift that kills at parties—literally and figuratively.
🎁 Number 10: Soldier Helmet Lamp – For the Hero Who Deserves Something Legendary (£250 – Last One!)
Stand to attention—this is no ordinary desk lamp.
Our Soldier Helmet Lamp is built from genuine military gear and recycled materials, rewired and repurposed into a showstopping light for army offices, man caves (if we must), or veterans who still shine bright.
At £250, it’s not just a gift—it’s a statement. And here’s the real kicker: it’s the last one. Fully discontinued. One-of-one. After this? It’s gone AWOL for good.
So if you’re gifting someone who’s earned their stripes, make it count.
🎁 11: Editor’s Pick: Texaco Oil Sign – For the Bloke Who’d Live in His Garage (£50)
Petrolhead. Tinkerer. Shed-dweller. We all know one—and this is the gift they’ll actually want.
Our Texaco Oil Sign is a vintage-style reproduction of the classic motor oil advert, hand-painted onto MDF wood with a beautifully distressed finish. At £50, it’s got the look of an antique without the wallet meltdown.
Real metal versions go for hundreds—but this one? Still oozes Americana cool, still smells like petrol dreams, and still makes any garage wall feel like a pit stop in 1950s Texas.
For the man who’s got everything—except this.
🎁 Bonus Gift: Gold Skull Scissors – For the Sharpest One on Your List (£10.40, was £13)
Snip snip, Santa.
These Gold Skull Scissors are part tool, part attitude—razor-sharp and dripping in gothic glam. Perfect for hair stylists, paper slayers, or anyone who prefers their DIY gear with a little edge.
At £10.40 (down from £13), they’re stocking-filler gold for the person who cuts through the noise and still looks good doing it.
Because boring scissors are for boring people.
🎁 Number 12: Luxury Wooden Alphabet Letters – Spell It Out in Style (£25 Each)
Say it loud, say it wood.
These Luxury Wooden Alphabet Letters turn names, initials, and inside jokes into proper design statements. Each one’s hand-carved from reclaimed timber, with a rustic vintage finish that screams cool—not cutesy.
At £25 a letter, they’re perfect for:
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Hallways, bookshelves, or kitchen walls (add your surname for that personal touch)
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Kids’ bedrooms and nurseries—great for spelling out names with retro flair
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Or anyone who wants their space to speak fluent style
Customisable, characterful, and way cooler than the plastic tat on the high street.
🎁 Number 13: Seletti Gold Starman Vase – For the Cosmic Collector with Taste (£70, was £90)
Ground control to gift perfection.
This Gold Starman Vase by Diesel Living with Seletti is part sculpture, part flower holder, all-out style move. Crafted from porcelain with a bold gold helmet, it’s the kind of piece that lands on a shelf and immediately outshines everything around it.
At £70 (down from £90), it’s a stellar deal—and here’s the kicker: ✅ Last one left. Once it’s gone, it’s floating in the retail void forever.
Ideal for: design junkies, space geeks, or that mate
🎁 Number 14: American City Signpost – For the One Who Belongs in the Movies (£365 – One of a Kind)
Manhattan. Las Vegas. Malibu. Hollywood. All roads lead to bold.
This towering American City Signpost is a rare, one-off piece that features iconic destinations like New York, Miami Beach, and Sunset Blvd—each arrow pointing toward pure pop culture glory.
At £365, it’s a showstopper. But what makes it really special? There’s only one. You won’t find this anywhere else—not on the high street, not on eBay, not even in downtown Vegas.
Perfect for film buffs, wanderlusters, or anyone who thinks their hallway should feel more like a movie set.
🎁 Number 15: Retro Letter Board – For the One Who Has Something to Say (£30)
Words matter—especially when they’re framed in copper and dripping with style.
This Retro Cinema-Style Peg Letter Board lets you clip and slide letters to spell out to-do lists, cheeky messages, cocktail menus, or full-blown life mantras. Great for parties, kitchens, weddings, or just shouting into the void in a very classy way.
At £30, it makes a cracking Christmas gift for creatives, organisers, or anyone with something to say—and a stylish way to say it.
Note: The small size’s already sold out, so snap this one up before it goes silent too.
🎁 Number 16: Comic Book BOOM Hip Flask – For the Secret Sipper with Superpowers (£17)
Every superhero needs a sidekick—this one just happens to hold booze.
The Comic Book BOOM Hip Flask brings retro pop art energy to your pocket, wrapped in a bold comic print that says “I’m fun” while secretly carrying 6oz of mischief. Perfect for party-goers, Secret Santas, or anyone who likes their gifts with a shot of humour.
Pair it with our matching BOOM Neon Light for the full comic book moment.
Because even Batman needed a belt flask now and then.
🎁 Number 17: Glass Dome Table Lamp – For the One Who Glows Differently (£120 – Last One Left!)
Minimalist. Moody. And made to turn heads.
This Glass Dome Table Lamp is built on a solid block base and crowned with a dramatic clear dome—ready to show off whatever bulb you dare to screw in. Pair it with a neon bulb filament for full cinematic effect (yes, we’ve got those right here).
At £120, it’s the kind of design-forward gift you give to someone truly special—or keep for yourself and pretend it was a gift.
⚠️ Last one in stock. Once it’s gone, it’s gone.
🎁 Number 18: XL Neon Light Bulb – For the One Who Lights Up Every Room (£21, was £30)
This isn’t just a bulb—it’s a vibe.
Our XL 17cm Neon Table Light Bulb adds bold colour and serious personality to any lamp it touches. Plug it into a vintage base, a modern dome, or your wildest DIY project—it’ll shine like it owns the place.
Was £30, now just £21—which makes it the easiest win of the season.
Bedroom? Lounge? Office? Ready when you are.
Warning: You may never want a normal bulb again.
🎁 Number 19: Anchor Neon Sign – For the Seafarer Who Loves to Glow (£218, was £229)
Hello Sailor… indeed.
The Anchor Neon Sign is a glowing tribute to nautical nostalgia—set in a slick acrylic box with mirrored backing for extra shine. In bold blue vinyl neon, this table-mounted sign is perfect for bathrooms, coastal homes, or boys’ bedrooms that need a little light and a lot of attitude.
Power-ready with UK, US, and EU plugs included, so it’ll sail smoothly wherever it’s docked.
Now £218 (was £229)—get on board before it drifts away.
🎁 Number 20: Stormtrooper Wall Art – For the Fan Who Knows the Force (£138)
A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far from boring…
This Stormtrooper Wall Street Art is a handcrafted tribute to the Empire’s finest, set against a real tiled backdrop with raw, urban flair. Think Death Star meets Shoreditch gallery.
At £138, it’s the perfect gift for Star Wars fans, movie obsessives, or any collector who prefers their wall art armed and ready.
The Force is strong with this one. And so is the vibe.
🎁 Number 21: Pink Flamingo Neon Light – For the One Who Brings the Heat (£80)
Looking for a gift with more attitude than a sunburned tourist in Miami?
This Pink Flamingo Neon Light struts its stuff in vivid pink, radiating personality, colour, and serious retro energy. It’s a perfect pick for teen girls, flamingo-loving mums, or anyone who thinks a bird this fabulous deserves a permanent place on the nightstand.
At £80, it’s the gift equivalent of poolside cocktails and bad decisions.
This bird doesn’t wait—and neither should you.
Click quick. The party starts now.
🎁 Number 22: Let’s Dance Light-Up Frame – For the Rebel With a Red Shoe (£120+)
“This is Major Tom to Ground Control…”
You know what comes next.
Our Bowie-inspired Let’s Dance Light-Up Frame brings neon glow, music nostalgia, and pure gallery wall attitude together in one bold piece. You can choose just the poster—or grab the full lit-up frame that practically sings on your wall.
Perfect for Bowie fans, music lovers, or anyone who believes wall art should come with a beat.
Pop art. Space oddity. Christmas gift sorted.
🎁 Number 23: Luchador Bottle Opener – For the One Who Opens Like a Champion (£12)
Tired of boring bottle openers? Tag in a wrestler.
The Luchador Bottle Opener is here to body slam your thirst and deliver suplex-level style to your kitchen drawer. Whether you’re cracking a beer mid–Royal Rumble or handing it to your dad who still misses the ’80s wrestling era, this guy’s got your back (and your bottle cap).
At just £12, it’s the ultimate stocking filler for wrestling fans, beer lovers, and anyone who takes their gifts with a side of headlock.
🎁 Number 24: Neon Pendant Light Bulbs – For the One Who Glows Different (£30)
Step aside, basic bulbs.
Our Luxury Neon Pendant Light Bulbs bring the heat with a warm retro glow that turns bedrooms, studios, and reading corners into straight-up mood zones. This is where nostalgia meets modern cool—and the vibe is always set to “stylish.”
At £30, they’re the easiest way to flex your good taste without shouting.
Unless it’s in neon. Then absolutely shout.
You’ve got taste. Now prove it—shop the real neon stuff.
🎁 Number 25: Marlin Corkscrew – For the One Who Drinks Like a Fish (£19)
Hook, twist, pop—serve.
The Marlin Corkscrew is your nautical wingman, finished in bold ocean blue and crafted from stainless steel and wood. It’s got everything you need to crack open a bottle: corkscrew, bottle opener, foil cutter, and serious sea dog charm.
At just £19, it’s the perfect gift for fishermen, coastal dwellers, or that uncle who swears rosé tastes better on a boat.
Catch of the day? Absolutely.
🎁 Number 26: Astronaut With Balloon – For the Dreamer Who’s Never Grounded (£74, was £93)
Space oddity? More like space perfection.
Our Astronaut With Balloon sculpture is the ultimate gift for star-gazers, sci-fi lovers, or anyone who’s still got their head in the clouds (and proud of it). Half cosmic décor, half art piece—it floats beautifully on desks, shelves, or out-of-this-world interiors.
Price: £74.40 (was £93.00 – Save 20%)—so yeah, you’re basically robbing NASA.
Because nothing says “Merry Christmas” like a floating spaceman holding a balloon.
🎁 Number 27: Hanging Space Moon – For the One Who Sleeps Under Stars (£10.50, was £15)
A little moon magic goes a long way.
This moon wall decor ornament is ideal for space lovers, dreamy kids, and anyone obsessed with the night sky. A great gift for space-themed bedrooms, and at 30% off, it’s a cosmic no-brainer.
Pairs perfectly with our Astronaut With Balloon for a galaxy-worthy setup.
🎄 That’s a Wrap (Literally)
Still with us? Then you, my friend, are clearly a connoisseur of the quirky.
From neon birds and robot butlers to Bowie prints and lunar décor, this updated guide brings together our boldest, weirdest, and most wonderful gift ideas—just in time to beat the panic buyers and last-minute lurkers.
We’ve added new gems, dropped prices on fan favourites, and kept everything unapologetically Smithers.
🛍️ Ready to shop?
Check out our Quirky Christmas Gift collection or Contact us if you need help picking out something utterly unexpected.
Christmas just got cooler.